Hello! It’s Squizzey here. I’m Kaff’s muse, pal, nutty special someone, a well cool dude, and head of the squirrel crew behind The Nut Press. I’m taking over the blog today as part of The Significant Other Blogfest. (Check out the link for everyone else taking part – I mean, obviously no one else has a Significant Other as cool and hip as me, but they’re probably all quite lovely and might have something interesting to say.) Happily, it’s also Squirrel Appreciation Day, so it’s only right and proper that it should all be about ME today!
Kaff has another Significant Other but he was too busy (read: scared) to take over Kaff’s blog and, anyway, he’s nowhere near as Significant as me. (You know it’s true, mate.)
So… I guess you all want to know what it’s like living with Kaff the writer, or Kaff the Faff, as I affectionately like to call her. Honestly, if she spent less time on Twitter, she’d have written many more books than the 1½ she’s actually done to date. In fact, if you reckon 12 words to every tweet and count up all her tweets…
Anyway, generally life isn’t too bad with Kaff, you know. I do okay. I have a deluxe hammock on her desk, where I spend most of my time being her muse. Kaff calls this napping and snoring loudly, but she doesn’t really understand what it is that I do. I’m hoping she’ll get this one day soon, especially as she’s writing a book about me.
She’s very squirrel-friendly when it comes to snacking – which she does a lot! – so I rarely go short of nuts or chocolate. I mean, don’t get me wrong, a squirrel can never have too many of those, but I get by. And, in the evening, we often get a glass of yummy amaretto, as a reward for a hard day’s tweeting… erm, I mean, writing! Yes, writing.
Every so often, Kaff takes me interesting places where I meet her much more glamorous writer pals and they’re lovely to me. They adore me just the right amount without calling me cute or anything icky like that. Last year, I got to meet lots of new writer pals, like Caroline Smailes, D J Kirkby, Talli Roland, Miranda Dickinson, Tamsyn Murray and Rebecca Emin. I had to giggle but when we were at Miranda Dickinson’s launch for Welcome to my World in November, someone came up to Kaff and asked her if she was the Squirrel Lady? I nearly fell into my cupcake, I was laughing so hard!
She’s going to have to get used to that, though. Especially as I’m hoping to have at least an ebook out this year. The Adventures of Squizzey. Part One in my decalogy. It’s going to be fab. Lots of nuttiness and the adventures of a super, sexy hero – ME! I just hope Kaff finishes it in time because, quite honestly, I don’t think she’s taking my book that seriously. She keeps referring to it as something fun or a side project when I think we all know that it’s the main event that everyone’s waiting to read. She completely abandoned it and me during NaNoWriMo to write something else. Can you believe it?! I still haven’t forgiven her for making a NaNo Squidow of me last November. That was no fun, at all. I was kicking my paws, really lonely and hungry a lot of time, because she was so caught up in her ‘new’ book. Booooooooooring. It’ll never sell. So, do me a favour? If you see her or speak to her or (more likely) tweet her… Tell her to PLEASE FINISH MY BOOK!! Thank you.
Luv ‘n’ nuts,
Squizzey xxx
I normally blog at SquizzBlog and you can Follow Squizzey on Twitter or find me on Facebook. I even have a Fan Club there!
[…] first blog post of the New Year but it’s not here. Nope, it’s over on Kaff’s blog The Nut Press as part of The Significant Other Blogfest. She doesn’t know I’ve done it, either. Tee […]
[…] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Kathryn Eastman, Squizzey Bult. Squizzey Bult said: Tee hee! I've just done something naughty over at @katheastman's blog for The Significant Other Blogfest: http://ow.ly/3HZMr […]
Well, hallo, Squizzey and welcome. Pleased to meet you! I’d never thought of sitting (or even lying, I note the hammock) my Significant Other on my desk. Actually I almost wrote Significant Otter, because he is….well you guessed it, well done. And do you know what he is called? No, he isn’t. Well I know he ought to be – Ozzy or something like that – but he isn’t, he’s called Badger. Badger the Otter. That’s because when we first became acquainted and despite the fact that he was carrying a knapsack with a fish sticking out of it and he hadn’t got a stripey face either, I thought he was a badger. So he said, well if I must be I must be. And he became Badger from that point in. Trouble is he doesn’t like nuts and chocolate. He likes fish, which is OK but it tends to go off if you aren’t very careful. But generally he’s clean and only needs a quick dust once a fortnight. I have a non-significant other too. He’s non-significant because he’s still recovering from a Christmas party about five years ago, still has the streamers in his hair. So he’s not a great deal of use as a muse. As you ask he’s a gorilla – that’s right a gorilla. Comes from a place called Africa, except he got lost on the way here and ended up in Mexico where he acquired a hat. No, not a sombrero – that would look silly on a gorilla, don’t you think? and he wouldn’t be able to see where he was going. No, one of those little hats that spivs wear in hot countries to make them look important. Made of straw and with a fairly wide brim. Almost like a cowboy hat but too kiss-me-quick for that. But still good for tilting over the nose anyway. And at least it shields him from dust. But gorilla hasn’t got a name – apart from gorilla. And he sleeps all day and everyday, unless someone wakes him up.
So there you are Squizzey. I do hope that isn’t too much information for you. I think I need an animal that will shout at me ‘you’ve written enough!’ I don’t tweet you see, so tend to be verbose. I hold it all back and then it comes out in one go. Anyway, if you have been, thanks for reading and have a nice doze in your hammock.
Hello Fennie! Kaff and I often read your lovely blog over at Corner Cupboard together. I look forward to popping over one day and seeing Badger and Gorilla making their very own posts. I, too, have a straw hat for my hols. It was essential wear for me in Italy, you see, or I could have become a red squirrel and… well, that just wouldn’t do.
This was so fun to read.
Go Squizz go! It was so nice to meet you recently; I think you’re a very supportive companion for Kath. And you’re a very dapper dresser! : )
Thank you, gorgeous! Very kind of you to say so. As you say, I am very supportive…there’s been many a night when I’ve had to prop Kaff up. You writer folks really shouldn’t drink quite so much wine, you know. 😉
Miaou Squizzey – purromise not to chase you but will chase Kaff over the writing!
I love that you think you could catch me!! But yes, purr-lease chase Kaff and there’ll be a lovely treat in it for you.
Hi Squizzeey! You are doing a great job supporting The Writer.
My significant other
LOL!!! Excellent contribution.
Squirrels – love ’em!
I’m planning on writitng a short story about a chance encounter with a squirrel (a true story).
I will post some photo’s of said squirrel on my blog.
Hey Kaff! I’m liking this Adam guy already. He seems to have very sound judgement and be a man of impeccable taste. I’m going to have a little scamper over to his blog to check out the squirrel pics… I hope they’re not, you know, *cough* those kind of squirrel pics.
Super cute!!! I love everyone’s creativity for this blogfest.
Dear Squizzey
As an SO I should think you would be more supportive of Kaff. She’s probably working very hard to support you and your very flagrant lifestyle. Who do you think pays for your hammock and all this lounging around? I’m sure she will finish your book in good time but you should be telling her what a fabulous clever and funny writer she is or else you might find yourself having to fetch your nuts yourself! (he he). TGW
Pfft! There’s only room for one ego around here and that’s mine, so I will certainly not be telling Kaff anything of that kind. I can only begin to imagine how much more obnoxious that might make her and she’s bad enough already.
I’ve got a good mind to send you to The Good Wifehold for a little holiday. I have a feeling she’d soon knock you into shape, my pesky little friend.
Surely there’s nothing cuter than a squirrel? Great post.
There’s an award for you over at my blog.
Shouldn’t that read ‘Surely there’s nothing cuter than this squirrel’?
Thanks Debs!! Really appreciate the award. Will be over to collect it shortly.
Ah, dear Squizzey. You hosted me on my ongoing blog tour…sigh. I’m still trying to get the bits out of my waistcoat, and the sound of hazelnuts cracking makes me want to hide behind the sideboard. Kaff is a saint. A saint, I tell you….
Ah, Jane… I’m sure the sound of hazelnuts cracking could come to be music to your ears, if you spent a little more time with me. I am that irresistible.
What a creative & fun entry! Love the hammock shot!
This is such a fun and creative post. Good luck to both of you.
Too cute! I enjoyed your take on the blogfest.
Squizz, I love your hammock and I want one too! It was so nice to meet you last year and I hope we can meet up again this year. Maybe at Talli’s book launch?
That’d be cool, lovely lady! I’d love to see all my adoring fans again. Kaff’s just about managed to get the lipstick off the clothes I wore to your launch last year.
Thanks everyone for the comments! This was a really fun blogfest to take part in. I think I can safely say that it’ll be sometime before Squizz guest blogs here again, though…
Sorry to come in late on this, but just wanted to say I loved your post, Squizzey! I also envy you the hammock, could do with one of those for the occasional nap – not that I have time for naps, but in theory you know … Hope to meet you in the not too distant future!